This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
