Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Randomize