i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
