She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
