tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
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