Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize