omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
