did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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