Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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