i just google imaged poop.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
