i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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