Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
