only if we run a train.
done.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I fill condoms, not promises.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
