On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
only if we run a train.
done.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
