kristin has been a bad kristin
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
