My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
i need an iv and a liver transplant
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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