Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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