what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
only you would photoshop your dick
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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