Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
