Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
