There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
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she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
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The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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