I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize