he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
It was confusing and full of hummus
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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