honey bunches of taint.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
My dick has a subreddit
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
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