Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Randomize
