I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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