Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize