One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
