Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
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