ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
