I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
