god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Randomize
