Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
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when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
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