Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything. http://tfl.nu/zym5
  Replies (71) Good night (706) Bad night (2831)
• Favorite

  (254): View more from Texas

  my sisters under your porch take her home

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (254): my sisters under your porch take her home http://tfl.nu/rfs3
  Replies (10) Good night (4787) Bad night (1074)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party? http://tfl.nu/rikb
  Replies (52) Good night (12829) Bad night (801)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (708): You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie. http://tfl.nu/ufjq
  Replies (13) Good night (1933) Bad night (2726)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary. http://tfl.nu/11rw
  Replies (15) Good night (3693) Bad night (989)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access. http://tfl.nu/o23q
  Replies (26) Good night (3954) Bad night (1430)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (718): The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be. http://tfl.nu/vr33
  Replies (5) Good night (3449) Bad night (1247)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie http://tfl.nu/a0bb
  Replies (5) Good night (3041) Bad night (814)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (647): Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen? http://tfl.nu/shhx
  Replies (25) Good night (2177) Bad night (2156)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try http://tfl.nu/7nb7
  Replies (1) Good night (1572) Bad night (570)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that. http://tfl.nu/eu5z
  Replies (5) Good night (1840) Bad night (384)
• Favorite

  (219): View more from Indiana

  he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (219): he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off http://tfl.nu/kmmo
  Replies (10) Good night (1185) Bad night (349)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.

  (360): View more from Washington

  1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits. (360): 1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you http://tfl.nu/1254
  Replies (9) Good night (2350) Bad night (386)
• Favorite

  (239): View more from Florida

  THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (239): THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW http://tfl.nu/gnot
  Replies (0) Good night (407) Bad night (190)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (307): When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions http://tfl.nu/bhkl
  Replies (1) Good night (478) Bad night (320)

Randomize