You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever