Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I need to stop coming to work sober
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
