I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
