I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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