I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Randomize
