Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
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