you have to choose: penises or morals?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
