Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Randomize
