508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
