I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
