Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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