That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Operation Purity has been aborted
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize