i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
