i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Randomize