Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
