It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
