BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
